By Emily Harvey
The day we all know as Valentine’s Day, Singles Awareness Day, and Hallmark Day is filled with sweet and sour moments from happy surprises to let downs; laughter to frustration; to receiving a ring pop instead of a diamond ring; to eating from McDonald’s dollar menu instead of a five-course meal.
Whether you are celebrating Valentine’s Day with a special someone, your girlfriends, or spending it solo with a bowl of chocolate ice cream and a scary movie, be thankful you have not experienced Feb. 14 like the people who have learned love is not in the air.
These are their Valentine’s Day tragedies.
“Super Mom”
When I was a junior in high school, my boyfriend, who I dated for a few months, broke up with me four days before Valentine’s Day. I was completely crushed because I was “oh so in love and ridiculous.” On Valentine’s Day, I went to school not expecting anything.
After school that day I went to my car to get my dance practice clothes with a ton of my friends. As I walked to my car I saw that my car was completely decorated with red heart-shaped balloons tied to the side mirrors, pink and white streamers wrapped around my whole car and messages, written in red lipstick, on my windows that read “I have the biggest crush on you;” “You are so beautiful;” and “Happy Valentine’s Day -Wes.”
There was only one boy in our whole school named Wes. He was a year older than me, “super” popular and played on the basketball team. We had never talked. My friends and I were all confused. My first thought was, “What the hell?!”
Then my mom called and asked if I had seen my car. I told her yes, and asked how she knew about it. Turns out my mom did it during her lunch break with her assistant. I was so furious–beyond belief upset with her. I asked her why she would do that and she responded with “I wanted to make Justin [my ex-boyfriend] jealous.” I was so shocked. Then she asked if he had seen the car, which he didn’t because he was not even at school today. He had a band concert.
My car was the only one decorated in the whole parking lot and I felt so stupid. She thought she was doing a super nice thing for me. Her plan was to pick the most random name. She almost did, but of course, she didn’t. I never told my friends that it was my mom and any time anyone asked I told them I never found out. That night I made my mom pick my car up from work and scrub off all the messages and take down all the decorations.
My ex never heard about it, which made me feel even more pathetic. We did end up getting back together a couple months later, but he never found out about it and now I think it’s funny.
-Andrea N.
Such a Disappointment
My one-year anniversary with my boyfriend, Chris, was on Valentine’s Day. I decided to make it really special by doing something big to celebrate both our anniversary and Valentine’s Day.
First, I had been coordinating with his mom to help make sure he wasn’t home so I could have time to set everything up. So to celebrate our anniversary I came up with 100 reasons why I loved him. I typed each reason on a little strip of paper. Then I blew up 100 balloons and put each individual one into a balloon.
The floor of his apartment was covered with balloons. The plan was for him to go through the room and pop all of the balloons to read a reason why I loved him (obviously he didn’t go through all of them at once. It actually took him several weeks to finally read all of them).
For Valentine’s Day, I filled up another 14 balloons. Instead of having them on the floor, I tied them all up together and had them hanging from the ceiling fan. I had them numbered from 1-14 and he had to pop all of the balloons to get to number one. When he popped a balloon, he would get a different surprise that somehow coordinated with the number on the balloon. For example, 12 had a note that said, “12 months of you and me.”
It then directed him to look somewhere where he would find a calendar that I made with pictures of us. The sixth balloon had a note to look in his fridge to find a six-pack of his favorite beer. The third balloon had a note to find a picture frame with a photograph of him, our dog and me.
When he got to the number one balloon it told him something he had to say (I can’t really remember what it was, but I think it was to name his favorite memory of us or something like that). Once he did that I unlocked his bedroom door where I was waiting for him.
So, after I had done all of that, which took over a week of preparation, he had bought me a really big teddy bear and had planned to wake up early the next morning to bake me a Valentine’s Day cake and bring me breakfast in bed.
The next morning, he slept in. So, basically, I went through all of that and did all of these awesome things for him to only get a freaking teddy bear out of it.
-Joanne K.
Everybody Farts
In the fourth grade, I was an awkward child who was cursed with the inability to carry on a conversation with boys (I still have that issue, but I won’t discuss that now). I had the biggest crush on the “class hottie;” those dimples and iced tips made many girls swoon. I had picked out the perfect outfit for Valentine’s Day; a dark pink, ¾ length top with ruffle sleeves and high-water stretchy black pants with ruffles on the end to match my sleeves. The white high socks with tennis shoes and braided pig tails really pulled that whole outfit together. I would stop at nothing to impress my crush.
On Valentine’s Day, I bent over my desk and reached for his Valentine. Then, I let one rip. There was nothing subtle or feminine about that slip-up. What’s worse is that my crush sat behind me, and he and his friends taunted me for the next week.
-Bea S.
Horrible Timing
It was Valentine’s Day in 2009. I was extremely excited because it was my first Valentine’s Day with my first serious boyfriend. His parents had decided to go out to some fancy restaurant and out for drinks. Therefore, we decided to stay in and cook dinner together rather than brave the ridiculous restaurant crowds. We made chicken and mashed potatoes.
Everything was going well. It was all really romantic until he said he wanted to talk to me about something and said he made out with his neighbor the other night. Needless to say, I broke up with him. I left crying and devastated. Sure we fought sometimes, but what couple doesn’t? It was tough because like I said, he was my first serious boyfriend and I never expected him to do something like that.
A week later, he denied everything and said it was all a lie. He wanted me to forgive him but to this day I’m not sure why he decided to tell me that on Valentine’s Day of all days, regardless of whether it was a lie or not (but I’m pretty sure it wasn’t).
Receiving that news was the worst Valentine’s gift ever.
-Emily P.
High Expectations
It was my senior year of high school and I had been talking to this girl for six months. For a girl, Valentine’s Day is a big deal. Yet, she broke it off a couple days before Valentine’s Day. At first, I felt bad about it. I was unaware and confused. I felt that I was going to miss out on Valentine’s Day because I was still hung up on her and wanted to be with her. But I had to try to not care because Valentine’s Day was coming up. I naturally assumed that things were over, but to her things weren’t. She still expected something from me.
On Valentine’s Day, I got a call from her. It went from civil to sour. She implied that I should have gotten her flowers and that we should’ve spent the day together. It was the icing on the cake. I was pissed.
It’s all about expectations and I fell short of them. I didn’t make the moves to fix things and figure things out. I haven’t made Valentine’s Day a big deal after that.
-BJ D.
I Don’t Want to Grow Old with You
It was my junior year of high school, and the first time I had a real Valentine. Looking back, I should have seen him as a disaster in the making. He absolutely loved to talk about himself, and didn’t really seem to care much for others. In fact, my friend had to remind him to ask me to be his Valentine before he finally did it unceremoniously in the library during Science Fair about 20 seconds before he left to go home. As stupid as it seems now, I was still really excited to have a Valentine.
I went home and thought long and hard about what I should get him. I finally decided to make cookies decorated like soccer balls (he played soccer). The night before Valentine’s Day, my best friend, who was helping me make the cookies, and I spent hours trying to get the icing perfect on the cookies. They ended up a little messy, but they were still cute! I texted him that night to tell him that my gift for him wasn’t perfect, but that I put a lot of thought into it.
On Valentine’s Day, I was really excited. I even wore pink and did my hair in the morning and everything. During first period, I gave him the cookies. He gave me a “song” that he “wrote for me.” I read it. It was about old people.
So I went home and Googled the first line of the “song” and what do you know? There were several hits for the poem all over the internet. And my Valentine definitely did not write it. It was actually a poem about growing old and being in love, which leads me to believe that he never even read the poem himself. What’s worse is that he didn’t even decorate it or make it look cute or anything. It was on white printer paper with black font.
I text him and called him out for this. He apologized. I stupidly forgave him and let him hurt me several more times before I finally realized what a jerk he was. Needless to say, this was my worst Valentine’s Day ever! I would have preferred no Valentine at all.
-Anita V.